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MARRIAGE/ Breaking down? Here's some tips for success. Lets get started?


– Hi guys, my name is Doula Nyree and you will find me on the Doula Nyree channel where you will find all things relating to pregnancy, birth, family, life, fostering, and adoption So if you think any of these things will be really helpful to you then please hit the button the subscribe button below

So today we're going to talk about that difficult subjects of if your relationship is struggling you've had children your relationship is struggling whether it be a partner or a husband or who it be and actually you feel things are falling apart The first thing to say to you is especially for those of us who are older it isn't something that you would be alone on and I'm sure many, many couples however strongly look from the outside however well they look like they're doing with their children will have their own struggles and their own difficulties and nobody will ever know about it So the good thing is that you found this video So that's the first step to trying to put things I'm sure that you know this and it's going to seem like it's an obvious thing to say but if you can't talk to each other that is your first thing that you need to do

And it might be it's gone way beyond that and you're not talking to each other anymore and you're not able to discover how each other feel about anything anymore So the first thing that you need to do is just find a single hour in the week where you can be alone and try and talk And it may well be that that results in a massive argument but at least you've made the first step So that's the first step you need to sit down together find an hour to talk hopefully when you're both in a calm frame of mind and when there'll be no interruptions and often you know couples come at things from very different angles It could be that you're a same sex couple or you're a different sex couple but it's still you might have very different perspectives on things

I know even when I'm having an argument with my husband that by the end of it we actually can't remember what it was we were arguing about And that's because we're coming at such different perspectives and we're actually really different but we've been married for over 30 years So it's important I think to have that open hour where you try to sort of push things around a little bit and work out what it is that is, you know, starting to tear you apart, really And I think when you have children there's so little time together that one of the big aspects of it is you can't remember what you used to enjoy doing together anymore because it's all about the children Now some people will recommend that you try and get out and go out for a lovely meal and have date nights blah-blah-blah

Sometimes it gets way beyond that on a date night it's not going to fix it Cause you're going to look at each other and you're not going to know what to say to each other So clearly you've got to have a starting point And that is what is the key factors that are causing you to sort of fall apart and move away from each other? Is it that you're not sharing any interests anymore? You really don't have any time for each other anymore or are there things within the relationship which are starting to grate on each other and you haven't had this out? Now, when you do have this out you might have a blazing row because both of you realize there's lots of things that are irritating each other but you know sometimes a blazing row is necessary really So that's the first video that I want to make on this

Find that hour together and start thrashing out what it is that you are finding difficult together so that you can start moving forward and working on the next steps So thank you for listening guys If you like what you hear then please subscribe to Doula Nyree and I'll see you next time

Source: Youtube

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